In a self-defiant move, the ultra-conservative wing (Control-Right) of the Catholic Church has banned everyone from speaking at any Catholic events anywhere. This ban includes themselves.
Local catholic, David Briton, put his self-consciousness down to nerves during his first visit to his local charismatic prayer group. Only later did he discover that in reality everyone was actually watching him intently.
A new descant for the popular traditional British hymn, Jerusalem, has been unveiled. 'This is like Banksy does church music.'